vivid-ellipses:

fadingsuggestion:

Fuck anyone who says I have to forgive everyone, “for my sake.” I worked hard for this anger. I worked hard to love myself enough to hate them.

Shit, yeah, this is a thing that is hard to articulate. Some people don’t feel healed by forgiving the people who hurt them, because that’s what they kept doing over and over and it only led to getting more hurt. Sometimes you feel healed when you’re finally brave enough to say “This person was horrible to me, and I did not deserve that treatment, and I don’t have to be okay with it.”

The idea of “forgiveness for your own sake" is bullshit. And I’m sick of hearing the justifications of “what forgiveness REALLY means" to make this Christian morality fit the real experiences of survivors.

You don’t have to “forgive" to find peace in your life. Just as you don’t have to let go of rage to find peace.